Julie went to answer the doorbell with half her mind still on the quilt she was piecing together.  “Jane?”

 “Hi, Julie, may I come in?”

 “Of course you may.  It’s so good to see you.”  Julie pulled her in and gave her a hug.  She was the one woman who she would have welcomed into the family for either of her two older sons.  “How about some coffee while you tell me all about the boys?”

 “Sounds good.  I have a ton of stories for you and several hugs to pass on to you from them.”  Jane smiled, giving her another hug and a soft kiss on her cheek.  “That’s from Sam who says thank you for the cookies.  He . . . is really happy these days.”

 “And how is Seth?  Wasn’t his birthday on the ninth?”  Julie glanced sideways at her guest and saw Jane relax.

 “He’s wonderful and we had a big cake for everyone.”  Jane sat down with her cup while Julie got the cookie jar out.

 They chatted for quite awhile until Julie could no longer stand it.  “How are Peter and Ruth?”

 Jane swallowed and set her cup down.  Green eyes lasered into hers.  “They’re both happy but something is going on that I haven’t figured out.  I’m down here to get some of the things we need for the wedding.  I was hoping that you’d help.”

 Julie got up to make another pot of coffee.  She needed time to consider the request although heaven knows she’d spent enough time lately thinking about her eldest son and the woman who’d disrupted all their lives.  “I had always hoped that Peter and you would get back together again.”

 “Nope, we’re good friends and always will be.  But with Ruth . . . “ Jane paused a moment.  “With Ruth, he’s found the other half of his soul.  He’s lost that weary look that he was wearing a couple of years ago.  Flying has always been his passion but did you know that he turned down a flight out to Jupiter because he’d have been gone two days and he didn’t want to leave her that long?”

 Eyes widening, Julie shook her head.  “And what is she feeling?”

 “She’s so fragile at the moment as if a breath of wind would knock her down.  It may just be the aftermath of her healing of the plague.”  Jane sat back, her gaze far away.  “But I think it’s something else.  I think she’s scared of getting married.  Part of her can’t believe that Peter means what he says when he tells her he loves her.  That may be one of the reasons that he wants the ceremony now . . . before she gets cold feet and calls it off.”

 “Yes, I’ll help.”  Julie had a sudden urge to leave right then for the Moon.  Her mother’s intuition was telling her that she was needed.  “What can I do to help?”

 Jane nodded and pulled out her list.  Julie listened to the list of items needed with dismay.  But when Jane handed her a platinum master card with her name on it, her curiosity was raised to a fever pitch.  Jane shook her head and placed a finger over her lips.

 “I’ve got an appointment with the designer in New York.  Could you come with me?  Call Edward and tell him you’ll be late?”  The devilish look on Jane’s face told her that major mischief was in the works.

 “Yes, what a treat.  I haven’t been to Manhattan for months.  Mother Penelope had an errand in September and took me along.  I’ll just give Edward a call.”

 Within a few minutes they were on their way in a nondescript car driven by a quiet man whose eyes never seemed to stop moving.  Jane told her some of the events that were not yet public knowledge.  Julie listened in amazement with brief flashes of anger at the callous men who’d tried to hurt her sons.  The story lasted all the way through the journey to Sam’s Guard base, the short flight to another Guard base outside of the island and finally the drive into Manhattan.

 The designer was a woman Julie had never heard of but when she hugged Jane like a long lost sister and mentioned some college prank she had a faint memory of the name, Elizabeth Barton.  When they sat down in the back room surrounded by long tables covered with bolts of cloth and seamstresses bent over whirring sewing machines, she wondered just what Beth had designed for Ruth and Marag.

 But when the small model with the pageboy blond hair walked out in the long flowing silver dress with blue lined slits in the full flowing sleeves, Julie caught her breath and held it.  It shimmered whenever the model moved, drawing the viewer’s eye with every turn.  The stand-up collar framed the heart shaped face and the diamond cut bodice made the most of the small bosom.

 “Oh, Beth.  You’ve outdone yourself.  You really have.  She’s going to look so very beautiful.”  Jane hugged her friend.  “What about his outfit?”

 “You’ll have to see it on a hanger because I don’t have Philip in this morning.”  Beth hopped up and told the model to have Jeanna come out.  Pulling out a rolling clothes closet, she unhooked a shimmering blue shirt and matching pants.  “I used the silver material inside the blue slits and the collar is the same design, just in the reverse color.  The bride and groom should look like a matched set.”

 Julie reached out a trembling hand to stroke the heavy silk.  “Beth, you’re a genius.  My son is going to love it.”

 “Cool.”  The bouncy red head grinned.  “That’s what I really enjoy, you know.  Taking a vision and making it real is why I went into this business.  I don’t suppose you’re going to tell me who they’re for now?”

 “You’ll find out next Saturday, Beth.  I’ve got an invitation for you to the wedding.  Oh, sweetie, how beautiful.”  Jane sighed when another model came out wearing a medieval style green dress in soft velvet and silk.  Golden ribbons fluttered from the sleeves and a gold belt hung around the tapered waist.  “She’s going to love it.  And Simon isn’t going to be able to keep his eyes off her.  Not that he can now, of course.  What about . . .”

 Beth pulled out a matching outfit to Peter’s but in green.  “I have to admit that I’m really curious to see these guys in them.  No hints at all?  Where is the wedding going to be?  I’d have to be back by Sunday for the Sac’s fashion show.”

 “No problem, Beth.  I’ll come to get you Friday night and we’ll fly on up.  Trust me on this, sweetie.  You don’t want to miss this wedding.  And I really hope that I’m going to be asking you to design something for my wedding.  Soon.”

 With a squeal, Beth hugged her.  “Do I get to meet him?”

 Jane waggled her eyebrows.  “Are you coming to the wedding?  He’ll be there.”

 “Yes, yes, yes.  Do you want to take these with you now?”  Beth hung up the outfits in her hands and motioned Jeanna out of the room.  The first model came back in jeans and a silk shirt with the silver dress on a padded hanger.  Ten minutes later, they were helped out to the waiting car with their arms full of opaque zippered garment bags.

 The driver laid the bags carefully in the trunk then drove them to a restaurant that Jane assured her was the perfect place to see and be seen.  Julie nodded and kept her calm even when Liam Neeson strolled by with his beautiful wife, Natasha, on his arm.  He was even better looking than in his movies because he was relaxed and joking with the maitre-de taking them to their table.

 “Now there’s a man who’d look good in velvet.”  She sighed wistfully before having to pat Jane on the back to prevent her from choking on her muskmelon.

 “You’re an evil woman and I think you’re quite right.  Of course, shirtless is a good look for him too.  My favorite role of his was ‘Rob Roy’.”  Jane drank her water and let her eyes stray back to his table.  “But then, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a role that he didn’t fit well.  He has a knack for stretching himself to define the character he’s playing.”

 “He’s lucky to have found his niche in life.”  Julie said gently and swirled a little more cream into her coffee.  “Some of us never do.  Did I ever tell you how envious I was of you?”

 Jane’s eyes widened and she shook her head.  “Why in the world would you be envious of me?  I’ve lately begun to wish for the life that you have.”

 Julie chuckled through the bittersweet feelings running through her.  “The grass is always greener, isn’t it?  I went to college but immediately stopped any career I might have had by getting married, pregnant and supportive of Edward’s career.  It was the sixties and wives still defined themselves by what their husbands did.  At least the wives of my peer group.”

 “What would you have done if you’d had the chance?”  Jane asked curiously.

 “I don’t know.  I honestly don’t but that doesn’t stop the ache sometimes when I look at my life and all the time that’s gone by.  Today,” she hesitated, “today I think I’d like to see about designing clothes the way your friend Beth does.  Fitting the style to the personality or maybe even bringing out the beauty in someone who thinks she has none.”
 
 “You’d be good at that, Julie.  You’ve always had the knack of putting colors and textures together to make a coherent whole.  I’ve copied several of your outfits after studying what you were wearing.  That beige pants and copper sweater with that swirly scarf always makes you look like a million dollars.”  Jane finished her fruit and took a sip of water.  “Maybe now would be a good time to lay out your options, pick the one that makes you most passionate and start to work.”

 “Just like that?”  Julie shook her head wistfully.

 “Exactly like that.  If these last few weeks have taught me anything, it’s that life is way too short to just coast along in neutral.”  Jane’s eyes gazed into space, one finger tapping on the pristine white tablecloth.  “The colonists are so passionate in their pursuit of the future.  They’re building a home out of barren rock.  And creating a family from the oddest group of individuals I’ve ever known.  But you know, somehow it all works.”

 Julie clasped Jane’s hand in one of hers.  “I promise to take a good look at what I want.  But for now, we’d best get moving if we’re to get everything on that list you gave me.”

 Jane looked at her watch, blanched and beckoned the waiter all in one motion.  Using a credit card that looked suspiciously like the one she’d given Julie, they were out of the restaurant and down the street to the five story Conran’s home furnishing store.  Julie reveled in the dinner ware and linen section.  Being able to buy everything she liked was exhilarating and she made the best of it.  Somehow, she just knew that the herbal pattern china would please Ruth while the green sheets would be Marag’s choice.  For the dining hall, heavy pots and pans along with every bakery utensil that the store had were chosen and ticked off the list.

 A butterscotch colored leather chair with wide arms and matching footstool felt like heaven when she sat down in it and propped her feet up.  That would do quite nicely for some of the colonists.  Inquiring about colors, she chose all six and ordered ten of each.  They’d be able to spread them around, she decided.

 By now, she had a personal shopping consultant who was her devoted shadow.  The last things on her list were silk flowers and they passed Jane with her consultant in tow on the way down to the second floor.  The reporter was fluffing comforters like a pro and she winked at Julie when she went by.

 The flowers were overwhelming in shades and hues that mimicked Mother Nature.  She gravitated to the simpler flowers, poppies, tulips, daffodils and geraniums in much the same colors that she’d gardened with for years.  Selecting the greenery to go with them was easier.  Lacy ferns, broad-leaved hostas and trailing vines all rested her eyes with their vibrant verdure.

 By now her part of the order was in the hundreds of thousands and she watched nervously while the consultant fed in all the numbers.  But the card was accepted  and the list printed out steadily, page after page after page.  The consultant sat her down in a chair and brought her coffee while it continued to print.  Julie reflected on what she and Edward had started out with and the way they’d scrimped and saved to have enough dishes that matched to give a dinner to both their parents on the same night.

 Smiling to herself, she felt that itch again, the one that told her that she was needed somewhere.  Soon, she’d see Peter soon.  And Ruth.  She still wasn’t sure what she would say to the woman who’d stolen her son’s heart.  The shiver up her spine told her that Ruth was the one who needed her.  She frowned and cast her mind over her sons and mother-in-law; the charming man called Wolf; Seth, her new son-in-law, she guessed she could call him; the nice Priest who’d done such a good acting job.

 It all came back to Ruth, the stranger.  Ruth, the Avatar of Earth.  Ruth, the soon to be daughter-in-law.  The warning twitch was for her.  Julie sighed and wished that life would cease to be such a roller coaster in the very near future.  Jane plopped down next to her with a vocal oomph.

 “I love to shop, Julie.  I really do but this little marathon has sated me for the next year.”  She leaned her head back and closed her eyes while her consultant gleefully began to run her transaction through.

 “How soon can we fly up, Jane?  I’m getting an itch to see my sons.  It seems like forever since I gave them a hug.”
 “Well, this lot will be partly ready by Wednesday.  I know there will be a shuttle going up everyday this week.”  Jane opened her eyes and looked at her.  “I think you should go up before then.  Something tells me that you’re needed.”

 Julie nodded.  “I’ll talk to Edward tonight.  Thank you, Jane, for rousting me out and making me feel useful again.”

 “No problem, Julie.  Even though you’ll never be my mother-in-law, we’re still family.”

 “Yes, we are, aren’t we?”  Julie extended her hand and gripped Jane’s.

 “Well, Ladies, we have some sheets for you to sign and a list of dates.”  The perky tones of her consultant broke into their quiet moment.  “Every page needs to be signed by you.”

 Jane groaned and Julie sighed.  The stack was three inches thick.  “Writer’s cramp, here we come.”

***********************

 Edward stood with his arm around her while armed Marines inspected their luggage within an inch of its life.  The last two days had been so full, she felt as if she hadn’t slept a moment.  The adrenaline was still pumping through her and she just knew that when she crashed, she’d crash hard.  But that would be after the wedding and after she’d held her sons in her arms.

 “Please step this way, Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton.  It’s a pleasure to meet you.  I’m Joshua Clemens, one of the human pilots.  If you’ll just strap in here, we’ll be on our way.  I understand that your coming is a surprise for Sam and Peter.  One or both of them will probably meet us when we arrive.  It’s still about an hour and a half flight time though so once we’re out of Earth orbit, I’ll let you know so you can come up to the cockpit and get a good view.”  The dark haired man with the engaging smile seemed very young to Julie but she smiled at him and watched him go whistling down the corridor to what must be the front of the ship.

 “He looks about nineteen and barely old enough to drive, let alone fly in outer space.”  Edward said wryly while buckling in.  “Soon, Julie, we’ll see our boys soon.”

 She held his hand and nodded, too close to tears to say a word.  They sat quietly until a soft chime and the ear popping pressurization occurred simultaneously.  “We’re on our way, folks.  Two minutes to take off.”

 Then the pressure pushed them back into their seats for a long moment and they were moving, but whether up or out they didn’t know.  Ten minutes later and Joshua’s cheery tones told them they could come on up.  Unbuckling didn’t take long and Julie appreciated the fact that they had gravity to walk in.  The wide-open cockpit was a revelation to both of them.  Windows stretched from the control panel up and over the top of the pilot’s seat.  And the view was spectacular.

 Black velvet sprinkled with bright white diamonds was Julie’s first impression.  Gesturing to a side port, Joshua pointed to the planet they’d just left behind.  How very small, she thought in astonishment.  And how very beautiful Earth looked with its mottled blue and green splotches.  White clouds obscured most of Asia but Australia was clearly delineated with its sister island, New Zealand, glowing green and white.

 Joshua gave them a running travel dialog before directing their attention to the gray moon that began to loom larger and larger.  Crater Plato was on the other side at the moment but by the time they got to her, she’d be right in position for their landing.  Julie thanked him and left Edward still asking questions to return to her seat to try and get calm for the meeting that she dreaded.

 What would she say to Ruth?  How could she welcome her to the family when she had such mixed feelings about her?  She didn’t want to start their new relationship with a lie and she didn’t want to disappoint Peter with a less than enthusiastic response.  But she was disappointed.  Sighing, she sat back and composed herself as best she could.

 “Julie, honey, we’re here.”  Edward shook her shoulder gently and she came awake with a start.  “We just landed and we’ve got a few moments before the airlock recycles.”

 “How do I look?”  She said frantically, smoothing her hair with both hands and shaking her head to clear the cobwebs.  “How could I fall asleep?”

 “You look beautiful, Julie.  And that was just a little nap to help replace all the sleep you haven’t been getting.”  His eyes twinkled down at her and she grabbed hold of his hand like a lifeline.  “It will be all right.  You’ll see, honey.”

 “All ready, folks?”  The cheery voice came from over Edward’s shoulder.  “You’ve got a welcoming committee waiting for you.”

 “Well, let’s not disappoint them.”  Julie stood up and settled her scarf over her shoulder while shaking out her pants.

 When the airlock doors opened, the first person she saw was Sam.  His hug swept her off her feet and soothed that wounded spot in her heart.  “Mom, oh Mom, it’s so good to see you.  I didn’t think you’d ever come for a visit.”

 She couldn’t speak, only hold on hard and try to stop shaking.  From over his shoulder, she could hear Peter’s voice welcoming Edward and knew she’d soon have to let go of her middle son.  “Sam, are you all right?  Really?”

 He sat her back down and whispered in her ear.  “I’m wonderful, Mom, really.  Loving Seth and being loved in return is more happiness than I ever thought possible.”

 Letting go her death-grip from around his neck, she looked at him with a mother’s eyes and found him beautiful.  He glowed with joy and she saw the contentment that had been missing in his eyes for so long.  “I’m glad, Sam.  All I ever wanted was your happiness.  I just never thought it would be so far away.”

 He laughed and turned her towards Peter who had his arm around Edward’s shoulder.  For just a moment, she saw him glowing as well with health and happiness then the crinkles around his eyes warned her that something was bothering him, something serious.  Letting go of Sam, she took the two steps to her oldest son and felt his arms go around her.  He had always been rangy but his body felt skinnier to her.

 “Peter, have you been eating properly?”

 He began to laugh and she was the only one who heard the silent sob under his chuckles.  “Only you, Mom, only you would nag me about eating after not having seen me in seven months.  It’s so good to have you here.”

 “Well, I’ve had a lot of practice feeding the bottomless pit that you call a stomach.  How are you?”  She watched his eyes and saw them brighten then darken.

 “Happier than I’ve ever been and more afraid, all at the same time.  I need your blessing but I don’t know how to ask for it, Mom.  Ruth thinks you hate her but she’s, she’s all I ever wanted.  She loves me and I love her but something happened and now I don’t know what to say or do around her.”  He closed his eyes and sighed.  “It’s good news but there’s something she’s not telling me.  It might just be feminine stuff that she thinks I won’t understand but I think you could help.  Would you?”

 Julie didn’t let herself hesitate.  Whatever problem there was she’d solve it or die trying.  “Of course I’ll help.  Lead me to her.”

 “Thanks, Mom.  She usually gets up from her nap about now.  Sam, I’m going to take Mom to our quarters.  Why don’t you show Dad where they’ll be staying?”  He barely waited for Sam’s agreement before hustling her down the hall through a huge room and down another corridor.

 Entering through an open door, she looked around curiously at the curiously mismatched furniture.  A green and gold landscape hung on the far wall and the table was set for afternoon tea.  But the room faded instantly away when the slight figure walked through another door.  Their eyes met for a long moment and Julie felt a pang run through her like wildfire.

 She was pregnant.  Ruth was carrying her grandchild.  Everything she wanted to say had to be scrapped and this encounter guided in a completely different direction.

 “Welcome to Moon Base, Julie.  I was just about to have tea.  Won’t you join me?”  Her voice was as she remembered, husky and low.  “Peter, I love you but you need to go away and let your mother and I have a visit.”

 “Are you sure?”  He crossed the room and hugged gently.

 “Quite sure.  We’ll be fine.”  She hugged him back then stepped away towards the table.

 He nodded and sent Julie a pleading look before leaving them alone.  Julie moved to the table, sitting and watching Ruth make tea with boiling water from an odd spigot in the wall above the table.  The silence was electric and she noticed that Ruth was holding herself so stiffly that she had to be uncomfortable.

 “How far along are you?”  She asked quietly.

 “Almost two weeks.  A . . . gift from the Goddess on our first night together.”  Her hand shook just a little and her eyes remained trained on the teapot.  “It was a surprise.”

 “I imagine it was.  Just how angry are you and don’t you think you should let it out instead of internalizing it?”  Julie reached for the pot at the same time that Ruth did and their hands met.  She held on to the cold fingers with all her strength, willing the other woman to raise her eye.

 The silver eye shimmered with unshed tears when it finally met hers.  “I should be happy.  I should be pleased at the thought of bearing Peter a child.”

 “But instead, you feel trapped in a body that doesn’t belong to you anymore.”  Julie sighed.  “Too many ‘shoulds’, honey.  I’ve been there, Ruth, and there wasn’t any place for me to be angry either.”

 She dashed the tears from her eye with her other hand.  “I couldn’t tell Peter or even Sam.  I’m too old to have a baby.  I just got my body back after all the months of healing and re-energizing.  And . . . what if I’m a bad mother?  I’ll never be as good a mother as you are.”

 “Oh, Ruth, am I the one you’re comparing yourself to?”  Julie held on hard.  “Nineteen years ago, the boys were growing up, Edward was established and I finally thought I’d have time for my life, for my dreams.  When I started throwing up for no reason, I prayed that it was the flu but within a month, I knew I was pregnant again.  I was so angry at being trapped . . . my entire pregnancy was difficult and I felt so out of control that I thought I'd snap.”

 “Toby?”  Ruth sniffed and began to return the grip.

 “Toby.  My last chance baby, the light of my life now.  But back then, you can’t know how badly I wished I’d never conceived.  I’ve never told another living soul that story.  But you are not alone and there is nothing wrong with being angry at the timing.  There’s something else isn’t there?”  She tilted her head and gazed at Ruth through the rising steam from their cups.

 “I’m so old.  What if there’s . . . something wrong with it?  Because of me.”  Her whisper was so hesitant that Julie barely heard her.  “Peter deserves someone who really wants a child and could give him a healthy one.”

 Julie stood up and moved around the table to the trembling figure.  Pulling her into a full hug, she rocked her gently.  “Do you love my son, Ruth?”

 A muffled yes came from between her breasts.  Dropping a kiss on the soft white hair, she smiled.  “Then this child will be blessed when he or she is born in love to two people who love each other.  It’s what got me through the dark time before Toby was born and will get you through all the coming indignities as he or she grows within you.”

 There was another sniff and Julie reached over her head for the Kleenex box, rocking her and murmuring reassuring words that had a chance of getting through.

“Are you sure, Julie?  You don’t think I’ll hurt the baby?”

 “You could never hurt your baby, Ruth.  And the moment the doctor lays him or her on your stomach and you see that scrunched up little face and the flailing arms and legs, you’ll fall so deeply in love that you’ll wonder why you ever worried.”

 Ruth chuckled half-heartedly and pulled far enough away to accept the tissue.  “I’ve never cried so much in my life.  Or been so out of control of my emotions.”

 “It’s going to get worse before it gets better.  But it will get better.  I promise.”  Julie sat back down in her own chair and took a sip of tea.  “First, we need to get the two of you married.  There’s plenty of time to come to terms with your pregnancy.  Now, I brought both wedding dresses and the grooms outfits.”

 “Thank you, Julie.”  Ruth finally smiled at her and Julie smiled back.

 This wouldn’t be as hard as she’d thought it would be.  And that baby quilt she’d just started would find a home quicker than she’d thought.

*****************************
End chapter 45